Tip Tuesday - Breaking Up with Shyness

Do you know the difference between shyness and introversion? Introversion is a basic personality trait that is characterized by inward-looking thoughts and feelings, while shyness is insecurity and inability to speak up. Despite the fact that shyness is most often the result of a painful experience, between 40 to 60 percent of adults define themselves as being shy, and most of us will experience shyness at some time in our lives. The good news is that shyness can be overcome by changing our inner dialogue and strengthening the voice within.

One person who has succeeded in breaking up with shyness is author and life coach Joel Annesly. On January 2 (World Introvert Day!), Annesly released a new book entitled Quiet Confidence: Breaking up With Shyness. In the book, he “assures those plagued by shyness that they can overcome the traumas that caused their shyness to develop, learn to embrace the beauty within and express themselves with confidence”. Here are some of the best tips that Annesly shares in his new book:

Avoid Negative Labels - Annesly writes that “labels can build you up or destroy you”, and encourages his readers to choose a label that empowers them instead of tearing them down. He says that you should think of yourself as “quietly confident” rather than “shy”.

Look Within - There is no better way to discover your true self than looking within and celebrating yourself. Annesly says that you should “Practice non-judgemental awareness, self-compassion and loving kindness for the beautiful person you are inside and the way you see the world.”

Stop Overthinking Everything - It is no secret that overthinking and shyness go hand in hand. Overanalyzing can lead to indecisiveness, mental exhaustion, and self-defeating, negative thoughts. The solution, Annesly argues, is to learn how to outsmart your overthinking.

Find a Safe Space - Annesly says that “When you develop your safe environment, a place where you can be free to be vulnerable, you will have no need to overthink things.” When you slowly expand this environment, your “quiet confidence” will also expand and grow.

Find your Friends - Develop a group of friends that builds you up! Make sure to only keep relationships with people who support and encourage you unconditionally.

Find a Creative Outlet - Annesly suggests that “Developing and expressing your creative passions can lead you to become a ‘Subject Matter Expert’, which will help you will naturally become more confident.”

Develop Positive Body Talk - Confidence doesn’t have to be verbal. Annesly writes that “Becoming aware of, and adjusting, your body language, posture and physical appearance can provide you with instant confidence.”

Want to learn more about overcoming shyness? Quiet Confidence: Breaking up With Shyness can be purchased here: https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Confidence-Breaking-Up-Shyness-ebook/dp/B07J427PNV/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1547469725&sr=8-1&keywords=quiet+confidence%3A+breaking+up+with+shyness

By: Jessica Hutt

Instagram: @jessica.hutt